A few months ago when I was purchasing feminine hygiene products for the umpteen millionth time in my life I saw something new, or at least it was new to me. There was a small reddish/pink box labeled Softcup. I had heard of menstrual cups before, in a vague sense of knowing that they exist, however I had neither researched them nor had any desire to use them. Let's be realistic, when it's that time of the month you feel gross enough, swollen enough, crabby enough... Who wants to make it worse by having to stick their fingers into their body to insert and remove a slippery blood-and-mucus filled cup, dump it out, then clean it, and do it all again? I shuddered (and laughed) at the thought of women actually opting for this when they could just throw it all away.
Flash forward to seeing a Facebook conversation between a friend and her friend about the atrocities surrounding periods and how much easier a cup is (one said yea, the other nay). I thought, Well - maybe I should look into this. That thought has turned into more than two months worth of research into a world I never knew existed but that I desperately want to be a part of. There are acronyms, Facebook groups, YouTube vloggers who specialize in reusable menstrual products (RUMPS) reviews...some of them brutally honest and terrifying. There are cups and pads aplenty, and if you search for reusable products you will find a dizzying array of Etsy shops, brands, styles, colors, and patterns to DIY. There are videos instructing you on folds for your new cup... there is more than one way to fold a cup, just so you know. Oh, and menstrual cups have been around since the mid-to-late 1930s... there's some food for thought.
A little history on my typical monthly product needs: 10+ light absorbency panty liners, 4 Regular or Super absorbency tampons, 2-4 lite absorbency tampons, 3-5 regular absorbency pads with wings (overnight use). This has changed so much since I was a teenager when I bled like a stuck pig for 7-10 days and cramped for 2 weeks straight. After giving birth twice my flow steadily decreased to the point where I sporadically spot for 2-3 days, have 2 days of normal flow + 1 day of light flow, skip a day, and then sporadically spot for 2-3 days afterward. Honestly on the days I'm home all day (which is a lot since I'm a SAHM who homeschools) I use a pad to avoid the TSS risk, and on those days I mostly naturally free-bleed (I didn't even know this was a thing with it's own terminology until last week). With so little product used, a pack of pads or tampons lasts me a really long time... I think I may still be using a pack of liners that I've had for 5 years. No lie.
The problem I have with disposables (called "sposies" to those in the know in both cloth diapers and "mama cloth") is irritation. Whether I'm using a plugger or a catcher, I get irritated. I don't know how many of you have sensitive skin like me (who doesn't have sensitive skin down there?), but all those chemicals they stuff in our lady products combined with the incredible chafing power of whatever the heck kind of material they top pads with adds up to a solid week (sometimes more) of discomfort, sometimes rashes depending on how much I sweat, and soreness and swelling from the dryness caused by the higher absorbency tampons. I am over it. Completely, 100% over it. The irritation alone is enough to justify making the switch to RUMPS. There are other factors, but we'll stick to this being just about me...
I found out that a friend of mine actually uses and loves Softcup, so on her recommendation I bought a box of the disposable kind (<$6 @ Walmart for a box of 14, which will last me 2 cycles). I also wanted to find something that wasn't a disposable product - doing my part to be more green and to save money. After researching product options available in retail stores, I settled on the Diva Cup. There are 2 sizes - size 1 is for those under 30 who have not previously given birth (either vaginally or by cesarean) and size 2 is for those over 30 or who have previously given birth. I am over 30 and have given birth, so I opted for size 2. They carry it at Walgreen's, so I bit the bullet and bought one. After 20 years of dealing with feminine hygiene products you'd think it wouldn't be embarrassing to walk up to a register with a box of them. It still sucks. Especially when there's a guy behind the register or when the girl ringing you up eyeballs the box and seems to be mentally comparing it to her own choice of product. It is awkward. First day of middle school after growing boobs and getting braces awkward.
At any rate, I had only just finished my cycle but I wanted to be well-prepared and in advance so I could finalize my research and figure out just exactly how not to freak out when the time came to try it out. I'm not sure there is much scarier than thinking - I'm going to stick this cup in my hoohah and it's going to create suction to rival a Dyson, then it's going to creep up and latch onto my cervix, and I'm going to have to call the gyno to use forceps to pull it out.
It's not a pleasant thought, at all. Then there is the sheer size of the thing. I unboxed it, squeezed it flat a few times, tried out the two basic folds (C-fold and punch-down) and thought - dang, I know I pushed out 2 kids, but that was years ago and things have long since shrunk to their original size, and how am I going to get this thing in there?!
Then my period was late...
Wait! What!? We were careful, obsessively careful! Ok, let's see, I was 5 days early last month and Aunty Flow was visiting while we camped. (looking at a calendar) Crap! Crap, crap, crap! That means that with my luck this time I'll be 5 days late and AF will be visiting while we are on vacation. Does she just like to travel!? Geez! That means that I'm going to be trying this cup out on a hotel toilet, or worse in a rest area, out of my comfort zone, within earshot of 5 other people, and a thousand miles from my doctor if something should go wrong. Ugh!
I knew that if I put it off until the next cycle that I would have to psych myself up all over again, so I decided I would just deal with it as best I could and try not to freak out too terribly much.
I was late by about 5-6 days, I can't remember exactly. I didn't have my usual lead-in spotting, so it caught me a little off guard. It was the day we arrived at our destination, and we were getting ready to go grocery shopping. I figured if I tried it out while we were shopping at least I would be standing and it might be less uncomfortable. I texted myself notes so I would remember to write this inaugural post and let a friend know my opinion, and this is verbatim what I have in my messages (more details to follow):
Saturday, July 16, 2016; 9:48pm07/16 - p day 1, pad until 3:40pm, cup for 6 hr after, pad to sleep. Tried punch-down and it hurt. C-fold I could hear open up but it was easy to insert. Could feel slight pressure in abdomen but no pain. Little like when wearing a tampon. A little burning at first. No cramping. BM was easy. Cup moved down until stem was out. Nice not to have string to contend with when wiping. No leaks! After wiping cup had moved back up into position. Removed, half full (!), cleaned, put in baggie for night. Used SE fem wash to clean prior to insertion and after removal. Not comfortable wearing overnight yet. It hurt to remove when I got to the rim. Not sure if I need a different technique.
Sunday, July 17, 2016; 8:27am07/17 - p day 2, pad overnight. Tried to insert cup at 6:45, wouldn't open. Tried again at 8:15, C-fold, not sure it is in far enough. Very dry. Need to use lube! Burns slightly from dryness. Wore 6 hrs, hurt to remove :(, half full. No cramps. No leaks.
8:40pmLite tampon until 8:15. Full but not leaking.
Monday, July 18, 2016; 2:39pm07/18 - p day 3, Pad overnight, lite for a few hours in pool, liner after. Liner with cup d1 d2.I tried the punch-down fold first because that seemed to be a relatively simple, highly-recommended, smallish fold. It was easy to do the fold, easy to put in, but the bump/spike at the bottom of the fold hurt as it went in. I also could not tell if it opened fully. I spun it, ran my finger around it, and it still felt like it wasn't open all the way. So, I broke the seal, pulled that sucker out (and it hurt), and tried the C-fold. This is a much larger entry point, but it actually went in much easier because there wasn't a sharp point on the cup anywhere. I held it sideways so it was a C instead of a U (some people do it as a U-fold) and pointed with the opening of the fold to the left. As soon as it was inside far enough that I had to let go it popped open with a faint but audible noise and a definite popping sensation. No pain, just a strange feeling. I pushed it up enough that the stem was just inside the vaginal opening but still easy to reach. There was a sensation of fullness and slight pressure in my lower abdomen, but I often experience this with higher absorbency tampons as well. There was burning at first, but I suspect this is from removing the cup after the botched punch-down insertion. I did not cramp. Not one single time this cycle did I cramp! That is a huge victory dance. While I don't cramp like I used to, I still typically cramp for the first day.
This is probably TMI, but you're going to want to know this if you plan to use the cup. Having a BM was a breeze. I despise having to do this while using a tampon. There is a string that gets wet when you pee and then you have to hold it out of the way to wipe when you have a BM... it's just gross to have to use the bathroom when you're wearing a tampon. Then if you have to strain at all the dang thing slides out partway and you have to change whether you are ready to or not. insert eye roll. So having a BM with the cup in was a completely different experience. Having a BM, having a baby, bearing down, it all uses the same set of muscles. That being said when you are wearing a cup and have to go there the cup does move down. I was afraid it was in danger of falling out, but I could feel where it was and I was ready to hold it in place if need be. I was afraid that the cup would need to be taken out and reinserted after the BM, but it actually moved back up into position as soon as I wasn't pushing anything out of my body. In fact there are numerous suggestions that say to bear down as if you're having a BM to bring the cup down/out enough to grasp the bottom/stem/grip rings if you're experiencing difficulty in removal. I honestly can't remember at this point whether I went ahead and removed it then or if I wore it for a bit longer. Either way, when I did remove it I was in some pain. This was a huge disappointment. I'd had such success while wearing it - no leaks, no cramps, no huge issues getting it in and open - that I felt like it should have been pain-free on removal. But it wasn't. And to be perfectly honest the pain persisted into the night and next morning.
I didn't think about using my Cetaphil facial cleanser to wash the cup (it comes with a starter kit sold by MeLuna), but I had Summer's Eve Feminine Body Wash handy, so I used that to clean the cup after I dumped the contents. Speaking of contents, when I have a typical cycle it appears to be full of clots that slide around the side of the tampon. After catching my flow in a cup I could see that it wasn't clotty at all. The cup was half full after 6 hours, so even though you can wear it safely up to 12 hours I would still dump it every 6-8 hours to avoid overflow on removal. I stored the cup in the bag it came with and wore a pad overnight. There are a couple of reasons for this - 1) being the first time using it I didn't want to stress my body out too much by wearing it for an extended period, 2) I usually don't need more than a panty liner overnight but wear a pad for insurance against leaks.
The second day I tried to insert it first thing after waking before I went for a walk on the beach. I was tired, I was nervous after it hurt to remove the night before, and I knew that early in the morning my flow would be practically nonexistent anyway. I wish I had taken a bottle of lube with me, but I didn't. It hurt to insert on day 2, and I'm not sure if it was dryness or residual pain from the removal the night before. Either way it wasn't quite as comfortable to insert as the first time. Again it hurt to remove and was only half full after 6 hours. I switched to a lite flow tampon after that in case we went swimming... it stormed instead.
The third day is my lightest day, and most of the time I don't need more than a liner or a lite flow tampon, so I didn't even bother with the cup even though it can be used for light days as well. I only used a tampon when we went swimming and then switched back to a pad.
After I got home I researched pain on removal of the cup. I knew that it didn't hurt to break the seal, it didn't hurt to pull it down (or push it down), but when it came time to remove the rim while keeping it parallel to the floor so as not to spill the contents it hurt like crazy. There is the absolute most helpful YouTube channel that I have subscribed to and watch videos on nearly on a daily basis that held the answer - you must perform a maneuver called a "hotdog in a bun" to push the rim down and away from your urethra on removal to avoid pain. There ya go. I failed to put my hotdog in its bun. Basically you place your thumb on top of the cup and press down while your fingers on the bottom press up on the cup forming an almost U shape out of the rim, keeping it away from the super sensitive urethra and protecting you from pain. If you'd like more info on techniques and cups and all other RUMPS, I'd suggest Precious Stars Pads on YouTube. Bree is an invaluable wealth of knowledge on the subject.
So, cycle 1 with use of a cup is in the books, and I just today received in the mail a 2-pack (small and large) of the Lena Cup. I ordered from Amazon yesterday, and since I have Prime it shipped very quickly and from a nearby distribution center. You can't get the 2-pack on the Lena website, but Amazon sells it for $36.97 which is a steal considering I paid >$38 after a $5 coupon for one Diva Cup at Walgreen's. The thing you'll notice is that most of the cups look incredibly similar, but they differ in areas like stem shape and length, cup width, rim style, capacity, and firmness. I am also researching reusable cloth menstrual pads, which sounds disgusting and a lot of people don't understand, but I love to sew and I love the idea of making my period fun. Oh, and I have a moonbox to fill and only a few short years to do it in.
Join a Facebook group (or 10), watch a bunch of videos, read up on other women's experiences, and then try it for yourself. You might find that you want to convert from being a sposies user to a RUMPS Shaker just like me.
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